Free UK delivery over £40 · Printed to order, so nothing's wasted (except your patience)

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Ctrl + Alt + Delete Life.Have you met people? We're not keen.

Dry, slightly dark merch for anyone whose patience with other people is running dangerously low.

Shop new inLimited drop
Patience: 3%Humanity: v0.9 betaUpdates: skip disabledMascot: not keen
Just released

New in

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Not a T-shirt

Small stuff

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StickersFor laptops that have seen thingsPhone casesYour phone, now less approachableNotebooksWire-bound, judgementalPostersFor walls you'd rather not face
Hoodies & sweats

Layers between you and everyone

Heavyweight, back prints, big type. Built for leaving the house reluctantly.

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Mugs & desk

For the desk you hide behind

Mugs and posters that say it so you don't have to.

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What everyone else is buying

Best sellers

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Exclusive

Limited run.
Then deleted.

Mailing list

We email rarely.
We like you about as much as you'd expect.

New drops and limited runs before they sell out. No daily nonsense, no "we miss you" emails.